Insults Or Ignorance?

Honestly, the amount of insults hurled toward me by monoracial folks lately seem to be growing exponentially. It makes me wonder if something's been added to the drinking water.

Last week, I wrote about two people who attributed my ability to earn good grades and academic achievement to my "Asian side". In both instances, I was flabbergasted by their thoughtless remarks.

Well, there's more. Earlier this month, I attended a monthly get together of artists, writers and other creatives. Walking in late, I spotted a friend at the large table so I sat across from her. During lunch, most of the attendees chatted with others they knew, too. But towards the end, a couple got up to leave when the Caucasian man suddenly leaned over to introduce himself. As always when speaking to Westerners, I spoke my name with clearly enunciated syllables. I watched as the man visibly wrestled with a question gnawing at him.

"Where's that from?" he said, before changing his query to, "What kind of name is that?"

Warily, I answered, "Japanese."

Most of the time, the response I get when I reply with that answer is, "Really? You don't look all Japanese."

So, that's what I was prepared for when, instead, the man looked at me intently. "That doesn't sound like a Japanese name," he told me with an air of authority. "It has too many consonants. Most Japanese names start with a K or M," he added.

Incredulous, I looked over at my friend sitting across from me but she, herself a monoracial Caucasian, said nothing.

"Actually, a lot of Japanese names start with Y," I replied. "My mother's name is Yuriko, her mother's name is Yone, and..." I trailed off as I realized that I had no obligation to explain anything to this stranger who already thought he knew it all anyway.

Since he had the nerve, basically, to let me know that he knew more about Japanese culture than I did, I wanted to respond with something really flip, like; "Tom? What kind of name is that? Is it English, because most English names have two or more syllables so your name should be Thomas, shouldn't it?" Alas, I'm a peaceful type who doesn't like confrontation so I just smiled weakly. After the man left, I leaned in to tell my friend how insulted I felt, but it was too loud in the restaurant and she didn't seem to grasp my agitation.

Then, last night on a thread that I was a participant of, one of the women became upset over some of my stated opinions. In a final hurrah, not only did she call me the "B" word, but also flung at me her conviction that I was a coward who hid behind, quote, "all that ridiculous hip hapa stuff". Ridiculous? Since she's a monoracial African American, I had to wonder what she had against mixed-race folks.

On to better news. The producers of Watermelon Sushi in our Tokyo office are revving up for more action so keep checking back for updates. Meanwhile, calling all talent, get your submissions to us by visiting the Hip Hapa Homeez group page on Facebook. There, you can read the breakdowns and get the address to send your headshots, resumes and DVD's. And if you sign up to join us, you'll be in a group that includes luminaries like Todd Bridges, Kool Mo Dee, Professor Griff, Jasmine Guy, Oran Juice Jones, Patti LaBelle, MC Lyte, Biz Markie, Lonette McKee, Bern Nadette Stanis, and more. We're about to get real serious here, folks.

Finally, it appears that haru (spring) has arrived. Check out the pix of sakura (cherry blossoms) in my 'hood, above.

Funny, that my mom likes to make gohan (rice) with ume (plum) which turns the rice a little pink. I started calling it sakura gohan. At the left is a pix of the sakura norimaki we recently ate.

And, below is a photo of my Mom cutting her birthday cake last week. Notice her red eyes caused by haru allergies. As for her age, well...if you're that interested, please drop me a line at hiphapa@comcast.net

Your Hip Hapa,

Yayoi

New News And Old

That matriarchal maven Madonna is back in the news again. Once again, the controversy revolves around her attempts to adopt a Malawian child. The adoption of her now three year-old son, David Banda, whom she acquired in 2006 caused a ruckus because it was felt that Madonna used her big name and big bucks to bypass Malawi rules and regulations about adoption. It seems she was allowed to have David without being a resident of the country for at least one year, and circumventing the required 18-24 month waiting period which applied to everyone else.

Further, it was downright weird since David's father was still alive. Instead of giving David's father money so he could raise his own child, Madonna seem to be playing the role of a rich white woman purchasing a poor black boy. Now, that may not be the case at all, but anyone who is sensitive to the enslavement of black Africans by white Europeans would be alarmed at the implication. Even with David's father waiving his rights and insisting that he wanted Madonna to raise his son, one has to wonder why. Why would any father of any child prefer to have his own son reared by a stranger?

This time around, Madonna has her sights set on a young girl whose mother is also dead. But like David, the girl has a living father. Just when is it okay to adopt a child, anyway?

I have a friend of Indian descent who was adopted by a Caucasian couple who also adopted other children of color. Although my friend had birth parents who were living, she was a sickly child and her family couldn't afford her costly medical expenses. Now in her 20's, my friend recently met her birth family. Since this wasn't my experience, I can't say what is right or wrong. But I know if I had been raised by other people and later, in my adulthood, discovered that I had a living parent or parents, I'd be mighty mad. I'd wonder whether or not my folks did all they could to keep me. I'd probably even wonder if they really loved me. But like I said, I don't know the complete circumstances. Maybe you have a similar story you'd like to share. If you're a transracial adoptee, please drop me a line at hiphapa@comcast.net and unload.

Also in the news is a resolution proposed by Senator John McCain, of all people, requesting a presidential pardon for the now dead boxer, Jack Johnson. Johnson, an unbeatable black champ, was arrested in 1913 for violating the Mann Act--"taking women across state lines for immoral purposes". Although the Act was meant to prevent pimps from pimping prostitutes, it was used against Johnson because he dared to date and marry white women. Besides knocking out so many white boxers, he had the nerve to collect the spoils, aka white women. Johnson spent a year at Leavenworth prison and his record was tainted. And now, McCain, who personally voted against honoring Martin Luther King, Jr. with a federal holiday, has introduced this potential pardon to Obama. Life. It's so cyclic, ain't it?

Finally, I want to thank all of you, my supporters, for hanging in with me and continuing to read this blog, buying Hapa*Teez t-shirts, and keeping in the mix with our Watermelon Sushi film. And, a very special thanks to Amina Kangiwa of MixedChild.com for such an incredible interview session this evening. Although her site won't be up until this summer, I'm confident it's going to be all we mixies want. Amina, who is Filipina and Nigerian, is a journalist who knows how to get to the heart of race matters. We spent hours on the phone tonight talking about our similar AfroAsian ethnic and cultural backgrounds.

Until next week, stay hip, stay hapa, stay homeez! And, don't forget to send me a Friend Request on Facebook--and join our Hip Hapa Homeez group, too. The last time I checked, Bern Nadette Stanis--Thelma--from Good Times was a member!

Above is a pix of our matriarch, my sister and me in the German woods.

Your Hip Hapa,

Yayoi