Everyone here in our Watermelon Sushi World sends you their best wishes for a peaceful and prosperous Year of the Metal Tiger due to descend upon us on February 14. Do check back for more about what that means. If you’re into feng shui, we’ll have some tips on how you can attract the lucky Tiger’s powerful energies. Tora!
Hey, this new year’s slate of interviews promises to provide you with more informative discussions about our multi-heritage experiences. Please feel free to leave your comments, or get in touch directly with some of your co-Hip Hapa Homeez through their links. They’d love to hear from you.
Remember, most newsworthy topics of interest for blendies and mixies are now being posted at the Facebook Hip Hapa Homeez group page. It’s an open group so sign up there to join us. Posting links and comments on the group page leaves this blog space open for lengthier interviews and more photos of our tres chic and looking good Hip Hapa Homeez. By the way, if you’re multi-culti and have a story about your world that you’d like to share, email email@example.com to be considered for an interview.
This week’s featured Hip Hapa Homee, pictured above, has quite the cyber life. I first noticed her blogging about what’s referred to as “blasian” issues. You may know that the term literally means black+Asian=blasian; whether referring to offspring of an Asian/black pairing or the coupling of a monoracial black and a monoracial Asian person. Onica Cupido, aka Nikki, is a single mother of a blasian—half Korean--son, Daniel, and writes about what that’s all about. Below is a photo of mother and child, as well as links to Onica’s blogs:
Q: What's a nice African American girl like you doing blogging about blasian relationships?
A: It sorta just happened. A few years back I was married to a Chinese American and, as we started planning our life together, we wondered where all the other Asian and black families were. After doing a search online, we found very little information beyond a few yahoo groups. So, we started a website and then a blog to offer information and support for other couples and families of this mix.
Q: What's your ethnic heritage?
A: I consider myself a black woman of West Indian Guyanese descent. Both of my parents are from Guyana, in South America.
Q: Being a single mother must be really tough, but you probably experience some really rewarding times, too. Can you tell us a little about both?
A: Being a single parent can be hard when your child is sick and you have to choose to stay home from work repeatedly. Or when you need just a few hours to yourself, but there's no one to take over the second parenting role. But seeing the joy of my son who's confident that I will comfort him, or be there for him, when needed is amazing. I have more encouraging times than I do discouraging times.
Q: Do you think your son, who has very Asian features, is treated differently when you step into the picture and people can see that he has a black mother?
A: So far, this is an ironic thing. No one treats my son any differently even when they find out his mom is black. It's like I was just an incubator for him. Maybe this will change as he grows, but for now it's not an issue.
Q: What about how you're treated when you're alone versus when you're with Daniel? Or, for that matter, what about when you’re with an Asian man?
A: As you can understand, when I'm alone I am just a black woman and treated as such. When I’m on a date with an Asian man, it's not that much of a big deal. Most people have a favorable reaction and think we're a "cute" couple.
But being a mom to Daniel seems to provoke some interesting reactions from curiosity to disbelieving to anger. Each person seems to deal with the visual of Daniel and me differently. I cannot explain the reactions, but I suspect it's usually based on that person’s internal views of black women and interracial mixing.
Q: Any ideas why Asian men/black women couples are so rare among interracial relationships?
A: That's the thing; Asian men and black women couples and families are not rare. Blasian couples and families have been around since the dawn of men and women. Due to the lack of social and media attention, people think it's a rare coupling when compared against other types of interracial couples. But there's historical data and references that show the union of Asian and black people happening for years.
I also think there's a undermining of black women being seen as viable dating and marriage partners. Whenever the idea of interracial dating is highlighted, it’s usually in connection with a white partner. This naturally brings up all sorts of past racial issues and puts interracial dating in a negative light. It's not very encouraging for black women who want to date interracially.
Q: What are the most common questions you're asked by blasian mothers? How about mothers of blasian kids?
A: Blasian mothers have their own unique questions since they already have a dual heritage versus a black or Asian mother with a singular heritage.
Mothers of blasian kids worry if their child will be accepted for who they are as a whole in either community. We as mothers love our own community and the community of our partners, but we wonder whether these communities will love what our unions have produced. I think this is a main question for all mothers with biracial children—of any kind.
Many thanks, Nikki, for your wonderful words of wisdom. If any of you read the recent postings of the young Chinese woman with a black father who appeared on a television talent show in China, you may be aware that she received a lot of hateful reactions. Born and raised in Shanghai, this girl has literally no knowledge of African American culture, customs or rituals. Yet because her father is a black American, many in China refused to accept her as Chinese. It’s a sad planet we live on where others still want to dictate to us who we are in spite of our own selves claiming otherwise. However, here in our Watermelon Sushi World, we are free to just be.
Until next time, I am freely
Your Hip Hapa,