Not As Easy As Black And White

Aloha Hip Hapa Homeez.

It’s still officially summer, and we’ve been out playing way past our bedtimes. Because of our activity-filled lives, our blog hasn’t been as robust lately. Not to worry. We’ll be bringing you more stories of mixed-race people, interracial relationships, transracial adoptees and culture crossers soon. And, if you’ve got a book, film or other product that targets the multicultural community, please drop us a line.

This month’s featured Hip Hapa Homee is Mike Reed, a life-long Northwest resident who grew up in foster care. A computer geek and comic book enthusiast, Mike also supervises a group of laborers, all with developmental disabilities including disorders like Tourette Syndrome and ADD.

half-Asian Bobby offers black doll to half-black Mike, left

Q: Mike, tell us about your parents.

A: My mother, Judy Reed, is white. My father, Clearance Reed, is black. I have no idea how they met.

Q: Where did you grow up?

A: Mostly in Washington State, mostly in white communities. I lived in Chicago for one year. As a foster child, I lived with various people. I never had a stable home and once, while living in one, I was removed by the State. Many good people tried to help, but the State of Washington worked against them.

Q: How did you identify as a mixed-race black/white child, and how do you identify now?

A: I do not identify with any group or race.

Q: What have been some instances where you experienced racism due to your mixed-race heritage?

A: The one that stands out is when I was in Chicago and called the police after being beaten by unknown black gang bangers. When the cop finally arrived, he told me that one does not call 911 for this reason. He said if he had to come back, he would beat me himself.

I have also been called names and accused of being races that I am not. I have had items thrown at me--from a moving vehicle once, and in a crowd once. I never did see who they were, but I heard one of them call me a “camel jockey”.

I have also experienced racism from girlfriends’ parents. Most of them were white except for one Asian parent who did not want me dating her Asian/white daughter. She said I would become a drug user by age 30 and did not want that for her daughter.

Mike with Your Hip Hapa

(Notes from Your Hip Hapa: I was once in the car with Mike when he drove to visit a white “friend” in Seattle. The “friend” happened to be in his front yard and as our car slowed, he peeked inside. “Man," he said laughing, "I thought you were a terrorist."

In 2004, several years after 9/11, Mike visited me in Santa Monica. As we toured the LaBrea Tar Pits, a famous tourist landmark, a white man approached us and pointed to Mike aiming his camera. “I don’t think you should be taking photos over here,” he said as if doing him a favor. “They might arrest you,” he warned.)

Q: As a mixed-race black/white man, how did you feel about Barrack Obama being elected president of the U.S.?

A: I was relieved that the opposition did not win. I knew racists would have problems with it, but my decision was not based on his race. People do not see mixed-race individuals, they see whatever color they want to see.

Bobby finds a white and an Asian doll at IKEA
to rep his Caucasian and Thai roots

Q: How does having a mixed-race identity help you relate to people with developmental disabilities?

A: I recognize discrimination when I see it. Disabled people are one of the most discriminated groups around. Very few people take the time to listen to them.  

Q: Any thoughts about the future for mixed-race people like you?

A: I have no expectations for the future for anyone as long as religion is around. We will all be eliminated someday judging by the earth’s age verses the length man has been on it.

Mahalo nui loa, Mike.

Here’s a video clip of Mike and some of the men he supervises hanging out at the Puyallup Fair.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8mznyuqYcU

Remember, join us at our Hip Hapa Homeez group page on Facebook where we often have these types of discussions.

And, check out these links:

Watermelon Sushi, the movie

Watermelon Sushi fan page on Facebook

Hapa*Teez on YouTube

Hapa*Teez on Café Press

Hapa*Teez fan page on Facebook

War Brides of Japan version 2

War Brides of Japan

War Brides of Japan fan page on Facebook

Mike's friend, Rob Lee, in a Hapa*Teez

Until fall, when we’ll meet again, I remain

Your Hip Hapa,

Yayoi

Halito, And A History Lesson

Halito, and welcome to the tribal drum circle all you Hip Hapa Homeez! This week’s featured Hip Hapa Homee is Boe Bvshgolawa Many Knives Glasschild--a musician, shaman and yogi with roots in the Blackfeet, Cherokee and Chocktaw Nations. To the left is how he looked when we met about 12 years ago in Los Angeles. Check out that baaaaad Mohawk! Below, is a photo of Boe today in his favorite yoga asana and surrounded by his instruments.

Q: What’s a nice Native slash African American guy like you doing teaching yoga in Flint Michigan?

A: I started taking yoga in 1998. After a lady pulled her SUV across LaBrea Boulevard and stopped in my lane, I slammed on the brakes of my motorcycle. My front tire hit her tire. I braced my arms, so I didn’t get hurt. But I had a very stiff back.

As an actor, I had a commercial to do, but when I got up I couldn’t move from my waist to my shoulders. I put my chest on the gas tank, used my hands to pull my legs over, pushed myself upright and rode to the gig. I took yoga for relief.

Later, I met my wife-to-be who was into yoga. When she got pregnant, we went to prenatal yoga. Then, I started realizing that I was enhancing my spirituality through yoga. Yoga also made me aware of not abusing the body. I used to smoke so much pot that my gums started receding. All of a sudden, it didn’t make sense to do that to my body anymore.

Q: Who are your parents, and how did they meet?

A: My father is black, Cherokee and Blackfeet. My mother was black and Choctaw. They met in 1953 in West Texas. My mother married my father to get out of the house. My father’s father was Blackfeet and Cherokee, and abandoned by his father. He was raised in a black environment in the South with "yes, ma’m; no, ma’m", and stuff like that. His name was Chief.

My father’s father, my father, my oldest son and I all rode motorcycles.

Q: Your maternal grandmother was a big influence on you. Describe her.

A: She was full-blooded Choctaw and died of cancer in 1966 when I was 10. When the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor in 1944, she went and got a case of beer to celebrate. She was anti-American because when she was a young girl, they put her in school and beat her whenever she spoke Choctaw. So, she made sure we learned Choctaw.

She was born in 1896 and married my grandfather in 1928. My grandfather who was born in 1894 had Chickasaw blood, too, but his parents died and by 1906, he was on his own.

My grandmother had my mother when she was in her 40’s. When I was born, she wanted to name me Hiawatha, but conceded to Boe. In the Choctaw language Chinchinabebo is the translation for Hiawatha, and the Muskogee word is the militant name Bvshgolawa. Many Knives refers to a tool, not a weapon.

My grandmother was very pro-Choctaw. Up until she died, she spoke the language. She used to tell me that her brother would take a knife and kill white people at picnic grounds in Okalahoma. She was very much full of hatred. But she liked black people. Her husband, Nelson, was black.

Our people were originally from Mississippi, but Andrew Jackson gathered Cherokee, Chickasaw and Choctaw and put them on the Trail of Tears. We relocated in one of ten counties of Oklahoma of the Choctaw Nation.

Q: Did you go to powwows?

A: My grandmother didn’t like powwows. She said they were b.s.--that the federal government allowed us to ‘play Indian’. She thought we should get together whenever we want, not when the government said we could.

She was the Amistad of Native American culture--outspoken, radical and very much respected. Grandfather followed behind her. Everyone had this high level of awareness of her, except her daughter.

My grandmother didn’t like pets and said it was like black slavery. She thought that animals should not be sold because you cannot put a value on its spirit.

My father left when I was three because my grandmother stabbed him in the leg with a knife. I saw him again when I was 43 in 1999, and discovered that he was in Michigan.

Q: What was your mother like?

A: She was born in 1933 and never acclimated to the Chocktaw Nation so she did not get along with my grandmother. She was more integrated into the American way. She grew up in the Lucille Ball era and grew away from Indian things. She dressed and wore her hair like Lucille Ball.

Q: You’ve lived in Texas, Los Angeles, Mississippi and Michigan. You get around!

A: I was born in Midland Texas, about 18 miles from the biggest meteor crater to strike North America in 1/4 million years. Around 18, I left. My mother got me addicted to California because she would go out there. I went to Los Angeles in 1975 and stayed until 2002.

Texas was so racial. I got elected safety patrol, but the white kids didn’t like me crossing them. I grew up in the same city as George Bush. It was so biased, and my grandmother was so radical. I don’t how she picked that place.

I used to love to go to Oklahoma. We had relatives that didn’t speak English. They didn’t want to be assimilated by force and wanted to stay where they were. They were empathetic towards Latinos not speaking English.

I’m enrolled in the Choctaw Nation, and a card-carrying Indian. I have my CDIB--Certified Degree of Indian Blood. In 1900, at the turn of the century, the government rounded up Indians like cattle, sold their land and gave them CDIB’s. White Americans don’t have to carry a card saying that they have so much Irish blood, etc. But if you want benefits from the Red Nation, you have to have a CDIB card for free medical and dental.

In March 2003, I moved to Mississippi. The sign says, “Set your clock back 20 years.” I thought it was a joke. It should have said "25". The first interracial prom took place in 2005. The greatest thing that happened in Mississippi was rap music because it got black and white people united. It means white people finally got some good music to dance to.

I taught yoga classes in a Catholic church. I drove 56 miles one-way because it was the only place I could find liberal enough. By the time I left 2 1/2 years later, I was teaching yoga in a funeral home.

In Flint, it took about a month or two to open some doors. I started teaching freebies. The first time I tried to go into the real world, I didn’t know that black men didn’t teach white ladies. I had to break the door open. Now, I have my choice of where I can teach.

Q: What styles of yoga do you teach?

A: I’ve studied Kundalini, Hatha and Qigong, and have Pilates certification. Some days, I teach up to five classes. The thing is that people will pay to drink beer, but not to learn yoga. If you want to do it free, come by my house.

If you want to be babied, you came to the wrong place. I had a lady of 65 doing handstands. A black coach came to class and backed out because these old ladies were outdoing him. If you use props, you’re not working hard enough. I can tell if you don’t stretch at home. People love their comfort zone. I say, push yourself. Eventually, you’ll get flexible.

I bring my daughter, 11, and son, 8, to class. Since my wife Brenda’s father is black and Cherokee, my kids got that Native black thing goin’ on.

Q: How did you get into music?

A: Music was my total focus. I decided I would make it in rock-n-roll until later in my career I realized I was wasting my time. The truth was rock-n-roll is a very biased genre of music. It wasn’t until the 1990’s that I really saw the racism. Rock-n-roll was borrowed and re-labeled, and blacks had a hard time getting into something they started.

Eventually, I started seeing that it was not about being a good musician, but about being a white musician. Growing up, I was a little bit blinded to what was going on. We would jam our a** off, but we couldn’t get a show. It’s really a racist industry.

I had seen the racism but, once I really acknowledged it, my combative nature wanted to come forth. One thing about yoga, it took a lot of anger out of me. Now, I look for a higher consciousness and vibration.

Thank you Boe for sharing the history lessons.

On another note, here are some links sent by AllPeople Gifts. After viewing them, let me know what you think. I wasn’t entirely sure if they were for real.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDAayFuIXvY

http://www.youtube.com/user/AverageNegro#p/u/10/oUfS2iaxwMg

http://www.youtube.com/user/AverageNegro#p/u/12/xBJe9NZ7dWo

http://www.youtube.com/user/AverageNegro#p/u/8/r0jPASWiMjQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCNrZDf8a9Y&feature=related

Meanwhile, you know the drill. Join our Hip Hapa Homeez group and Watermelon Sushi Fan pages on Facebook, and follow watermelonsushi on Twitter. Remember, we have Hapa*Teez t-shirts for you and a rear crawl credit on our film if you make a purchase.

See you next week when I shall once again proclaim myself to be,

Your Hip Hapa,

Yayoi

Poetic Powwows

Yo! Check out who’s in the Hip Hapa Homeez house this week. None other than Asani Winfrey Charles--who may or may not be related to Your Hip Hapa. I first met Asani when she lived in Long Beach, and I in Santa Monica. Contacting me to inquire whether we might be kin to each other (and Oprah), Asani emailed me a lengthy story about the Winfrey clan. Somewhere in our conversation, we discovered that we both knew the rapper Miwa Lyric. Eventually, the three of us met for dinner and have been in each other’s worlds ever since. That’s Asani in the photos, above and below.

A poet, a high school English teacher, a wife and a mother, Asani defines her writing style as “eclectically narrative”. Her childhood, steeped in multiculturalism, is reflected in her work which has been published in Ahani: Indigenous American Poetry, Yellow Medicine Review, and the forthcoming I Was Indian, edited by Susan DeerCloud.

Asani has also released a spoken word CD called Word Songs for Grandmas. Darrell Blackbear, Sr. of The Bear Claw Singers joins her on several pieces, which they refer to as recording "poetry over powwow".

When she’s not teaching or writing, Asani dances Southern Women's Cloth at powwows. A resident of Texas, her dream is to buy an RV and travel the powwow trail from coast to coast with her family.

View Asani’s links below, then check out what she has to say in the Q&A following:

http://www.myspace.com/asanicharles

http://www.pw.org/content/asani_charles

http://heyokamagazine.com/heyoka_magazine.31.asani_charles.htm

Q: How did a nice mixed-race girl like you end up being a poetess?

A: I was exposed to poetry at a very young age. I remember my mother reading me classic fairy tales and Nikki Giovanni (as early as 6 or 7 years-old) before I went to bed. The cover of Grimm's Fairy Tales scared me so I would ask her to read Nikki instead. Then, one day in second grade, we were asked to write a poem about spring. I did, and my mother still brags about my first piece, The Trees Are Here.

Q: What are your parents’ ethnicities, and what did each teach you about their cultures?

A: Both of my parents are “redblack” mixedbloods with a little extra for flavor. My mother is Choctaw, black and Louisiana French, and my father is Chickasaw, black and English. I guess I was raised black, but our concept of blackness was quite different than most families, I think. Both parents grew up outside of Oklahoma, so their parents infused a lot of Indian ways in their rearing without saying it was so. My maternal grandmother told me our ancestors were Indian as well as black, but nothing else was said (outside of one of our matriarchal aunts who I took for being senile). I saw my maternal great grandmother, my only full African roots, as the cornerstone of the family and that was that. My father's mother was very quiet about her people and didn't share anything with me until I was an adult.

Q: How much does your poetry reflect your multiracial heritage?

A: I believe poetry is life in print, so my poetry reflects my life and all its facets. I see multiple ideas and themes running through my work. Multiracialism or multiculturalism appears a lot, as well as politics and verses about nature.

Q: How do your three children identify racially?

A: My three children are interesting. They share the same father, my husband, but he too comes from more than one root, so all three kids are unique in coloring and appearance. They each identify as both Indian and black, but are realistic about how society perceives them.

Q: As both a mother and a teacher, how do you present multiracial issues to your classroom and at home?

A: My kids are raised to be culturally aware of their heritages and of others. They appreciate diversity and are taught to never marginalize cultures. My students are not that fortunate, so I am a huge proponent of multicultural education. For many students, I am the first Indian they've ever met, so I use the classroom to dispel myths and lies, and incorporate multicultural literature to broaden students' knowledge about people from different cultural perspectives.

Q: What do you think is the biggest misunderstanding between African Americans and Native Americans?

A: The biggest misunderstanding is also the saddest, and that is that too many African Americans have little or no knowledge of American Indians at all. One would think that with our marginalized history, African Americans would appreciate Indians' shared struggles, but the knowledge just isn't there, so the oppressed oppress others. About African Americans, many American Indians assume blacks simply have their hands out like whites or white "wannabees". Some of that assumption is based on true experiences, but it is not the norm. Indians don't realize that African Americans have had family histories erased due to slavery, so often blacks are not looking for tribal benefits but a real sense of family history.

Q: How long have you been dancing at powwows? Personally, I’ve attended them in California, Hawai’i and Washington State so I’m curious to know if you have a favorite.

A: I have been dancing about 13 years now. I now realize I was spoiled in California. Across Indian Country, powwow season runs from March to mid-September, but dances in Southern California are pretty consistent each weekend and close by. North Texas is a different story. We have a few local powwows, but the rest are a bit of a drive. As for favorites, I have to go with Cal State Long Beach and my alma mater, UCLA.

Thank you, Asani for sharing your fascinating family history and love for culture. If you’re a Hip Hapa Homee with an interesting tale, hollah at hiphapa@comcast.net

Meanwhile, here’s an article and a YouTube clip about a Chinese African American woman living in Shanghai who some Chinese claim shouldn’t be considered Chinese at all even though she was born and raised in China:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/time/20090925/wl_time/08599192558900

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTExNzMwNDk2.html

I also read a piece in Parade Magazine last weekend about Caucasian actor Pernell Roberts who rose to fame as the eldest son of Ben Cartwright on the TV series Bonanza. He was the fearless son, one of three, who always dressed in black. Well, unbeknownst to Your Hip Hapa, Roberts was also a civil rights activist who marched from Selma to Montgomery in 1965. Reportedly, he left the show because he felt NBC was racist for allowing white actors to play minority characters--like Marlo Thomas acting as a Chinese woman. Actor Victor Sen Yung played Hop Sing, the Cartwright’s loyal Chinese cook, but I didn’t read anything specific about Roberts’ feelings over Yung’s subservient role probably because it was a reality for Chinese during that time in the West. For Roberts, the highly rated Bonanza was, well, a bonanza. So, for him to walk away over the way people of color were portrayed was monumental. Here’s a shout-out to Pernell Roberts!

Finally to Hip Hapa Homeez’ Number One Fan, Ms. Paulette T., thank you for this link:

http://books.google.com/books?id=9d9FC -gcWaAC&pg=PA89&lpg=PA89&dq=magnus+morner+race+chart&source=bl&ots=rLOvL-yqRE&sig=cDfRRjVuZEb3r5MG3Lik3Fan91E&hl=en&ei=8yG0SsDTApG-sgO8u6yeDQ&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=9#v=onepage&q=&f=false

As always, big ups to all of you Hip Hapa Homeez for your continued support. We especially appreciate your purchases of our Hapa*Teez t-shirts. Don’t forget to contact us when you buy one so we can add your name to our list of credits for the Watermelon Sushi film. And, remember we’re on Facebook where you can join our Watermelon Sushi Fan Page and Hip Hapa Homeez group, and on Twitter where you can follow lines of dialogue from our Watermelon Sushi script. And, that list of Ning sites I promised last week is being compiled even as we read and write.

Until next Wednesday, I am...

Your Hip Hapa,

Yayoi

Marvelous Miwa Lyric, Again!

This week’s Hip Hapa Homee is a long-time acquaintance of Your Hip Hapa. I like to refer to her as The Marvelous Miwa Lyric because she really is something to marvel at. A clothing designer, music producer, performer, rapper, songwriter and more, Miwa is also immensely popular—especially in Los Angeles where she currently resides. We first met because of the proliferation of emails she sent me marketing herself. Surely, I thought, anyone believing so strongly in her own skills was well worth knowing. And, I was right. Friend the friendly Miwa Lyric on Facebook or MySpace. That’s her in the photo here taken by Suzisusana.

Q: What's a nice Nissei (second-generation Japanese American) girl like you doing rapping?

A: I don't really like to be categorized as nice, or categorized at all, cause I am not really "nice". I just love music and through my childhood struggles, music is the one thing that kept me alive, literally.

Q: When did you know for sure that you wanted a career in music?

A: At the age of five.

Q: How have black audiences responded to you compared to Asian or more racially mixed ones?

A: It's rather recent that I perform in front of Asian audiences. When I first started about 12 years ago, there were not many Asians in the audience or in hiphop in general. A lot of Asian women come up to me and tell me that I inspire them to chase after their dreams--knowing the odds of me being Asian and female in hiphop. A lot of black audiences usually give me a blank look when I approach the stage. Then, when I start, they just roar up with smiles and claps. It's always a good feeling! Overall, I get a lot of surprised reactions from everyone because most people think I'm gonna go up on stage to sing, then when I start rapping they just flip out.

Q: Lately, hiphop is everywhere. It may have started out with black gangs in New York, but now even Japanese Ainu (Indigenous) are rapping. Do you think the art form is played out because it’s no longer quote, unquote, pure?

A: I feel like hiphop that calls itself hiphop nowadays has lost its message of the struggle, the movement. It seems like the newer generations have forgotten the past and where hiphop and just history in general comes from. But then again, those who are passing it down need to educate the young ones as well. Me, being in between the new school and old school, I hope to connect that. I think the new music now is a new type of hiphop but it is definitely not the "real" or "original" hiphop that it used to be.

Q: You have such a huge following in L.A. Can you explain why your fans are so devoted to you?

A: Well first off, I am different--something new and, like I mentioned earlier, I was against all odds, which gives people hope that maybe they can go after what they always wanted to try (not just music, but everything in general) but were afraid to. But I think, overall, it’s because I speak from my heart. Everything I write about are things that I want to address because of my experiences and my own personal struggles. Many can relate and those who can't, see a new perspective. I feel that whether people love me or hate me, I bring words that people can ponder about.

Q: Recently, you've been appearing in Japan. How did it feel to perform for people who look like you, but who are so different at the same time?

A: It was an amazing and scary experience. Scary because I have always heard that they don't react like us Americans do, but I proved that wrong. They were bobbing their heads and had their hands up! They showed me that music definitely connects people worldwide!

Q: Your parents don't seem like typical Japanese parents because they allow you and your sister (a fashion designer) to fully express your art. Do you have any thoughts on that?

A: I guess since they are not typical I really wouldn't know what typical defines! But my folks are both artists, and they lived the times through the war. They’ve both seen different parts of the world (dad lived in New York, mom in England), and my dad struggled through poverty and losing his parents at a young age so he never got to go to high school. My mom was definitely a "new age woman", the type of lady that escapes the "norm" and how women shouldn’t be able to do what they want. My dad was always very supportive of my music, but my mom was not. She told me that I had to prove to her that I wanted it, and I proved it to her.

Indeed you have, Marvelous Miwa Lyric. For more info on Miwa, check out the sites below:

http://www.miwalyric.com

http://www.miwakayama.com

http:// www.soulawear.com

http://www.cdbaby.net/miwalyric

http://www.itunes.com

If you Hip Hapa Homeez haven’t already, you should check out the video below. Can you believe it? After all the information educating folks about the nonsense of being color struck, here comes this travesty. I feel like I was just transported back to the plantation or something.

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/world/2009/09/09/sidner.india.white.skin.cnn

Anyway, please keep your comments and emails coming. A special shout-out to my girl, Mary no-last-name-please, for continuing to stay so involved with this blog.

Remember to join our Hip Hapa Homeez group on Facebook and our Watermelon Sushi fan page, too. We’re also trying to tweet on Twitter as much as we can (honestly, we forget with all the things we have to do). And, we still have those t-shirts.

Until next week, I am…

Your Hip Hapa,

Yayoi

Michiko's Dilemma, Diana And Upcoming Events

Since there's no Hip Hapa Homee to feature this week, I'm posting a lengthy comment from a reader. Let's just call her Michiko.

My original question: Okay. So, what do you readers think? Do mixed-race people with black ethnicities tend to shun that part of themselves? Drop us a line at hiphapa@comcast.net and tell all!

Hello Yayoi!

I just read your 20 May blog on Watermelon Sushi World, and would like to reply to your question.

The following has been my experience:

Before I entered public school, my only experience with people outside of my immediate family were my white neighbors and my mother's Japanese friends (who were also married to black service members) and their children. At that time, I had no idea that I looked any different from anyone else. I never gave any thought to it.

On the first day of school in the first grade, I was surrounded by a group of black kids. They encircled me, and one of them asked, "What are you, anyway?" I really didn't know what he was asking, so I didn't answer. Then, several of them chimed in with, "Yeah, what are you?"

Still, I had no clue what they were saying so I just stood there and said nothing.

One of them asked, "Do you speak English?"

I answered, "Yes".

He said, "Because you look Chinese. Are you Chinese?"

I said, "No."

So again he asked, "What are you?"

At this point, I became frustrated and started to cry because I still didn't understand what I was being asked.

A little white girl named Carol walked into the middle of circle and took me by the arm. She looked at the kids and said, "Leave her alone. She's colored, okay? Now, leave her alone."

The other kids were shocked. "What do you mean she's colored?" they asked.

Carol put her arm next to mine, compared them and said, "See! She's colored."

That put an end to that and from that day on, I was known as the "colored girl with the Chinese eyes and the good hair."

As I entered adolesence and young adulthood, I was confronted with several odd questions and heard the opinions of many blacks on my mixed ethnicity. (Here's where I get the meat of your question!)

I have been told by some black girls that I'm not "really" one of them because I have "good hair" and, thus, I became the target of several bully girls who would sneer that I was "trying" to be one of them, and that I thought I was better than them because I was "light-skinned with good hair". These traits most certainly meant (to them) that I had a hidden agenda, and was out to get whatever it was that they were entitled to which was only given to me because of those traits. Those traits also meant (according to them) that I was conceited, stuck-up and "fast".

Because of those experiences, I have never really felt accepted by black women. My closest friends were mainly gay men and open-minded white women.

When I married my husband (who is an extremely dark-skinned man from Central America, exceptionally intelligent, kind and a practicing M.D.), my mother told me that one of her black female co-workers made this statement: "Your daughter is so beautiful. She could have had a white man. Why did she marry someone so dark?"

When I returned from my honeymoon and showed one of my black female coworkers my wedding pictures, she commented, "I'm really surprised that you married someone so dark."

After not seeing my high school best friend's brother for several years after graduation, I met up with him when we were living in Las Vegas. As my two children and I walked through a lobby, my friend's brother said, "Oh my god, Michiko! You have black children! I never expected you to marry a black man!"

So is it that we shun that part of ourselves? Or, do they shun us?

Our family lived in Italy for three years. We lived in a farming community where most of the residents were older Italians. To them, I was just "American". I no longer had to feel concious of explaining my ethnicity to strangers.

Then, we moved from Italy to Okinawa where there are many Americans.

One day, I was in the officer's club with my young son who was about 16 months old. He walked up to a black American man and gestered that he wanted to be picked up. The man asked me, "Where are you from?" I said, "New Jersey". He said, "No you're not. Where are you really from?" I replied, "I was born in Virginia, but I moved to New Jersey when I was three months old." At this point he was getting annoyed with me because he thought I was trying to be fresh, but I was simply answering his question, 'Where are you from?'. He said, "No. You know what I mean." So, I reverted back to my first-grade answer, "I'm colored." Well, I didn't say "colored". I said, "I'm black". He said ,"No you're not."

I had to walk away because I was getting frustrated.

So to answer your question, I think there may be some who shun that part of themselves. I, for one, love my black side! I love black culture, and I feel so proud of that part of myself. I also love the culture of my Japanese side.

If you ask me today, I will tell you that I am half black and half Japanese. In the past, I heard that 'you are what your father is'. But I always felt that I couldn't look at my Japanese mother and not give her credit for contributing to who I am.

Whenever we move, I always encounter people who "wonder" what I am. When they finally ask and I tell them, they say, "I knew there was something black about you, but I knew there was something else, and I wasn't sure what it was." Sometimes people will use the word "exotic".

I feel that the people I encounter these days seem to be more enlightened on issues of mixed-race people, and that makes me happy. And today, I can say that I feel accepted by my black peers.

I think that we are all entitled to declare "what we are" based on our experiences and our own self-concept. I can understand why Halle Berry and Barak Obama say they are black. And I can also understand why Tiger Woods says he is Cablasian.

Thanks for listening!

Michiko

Unfortunately, Michiko wishes to remain anonymous so I don't have a photo to post. Instead, here's one of my family that probably looks similar to hers. In my own life, after our family left the security of military bases where mixies abounded, I found that my best friends were often Latina women. Perhaps because of their own mestizo backgrounds, they understood better the dilemma of being multiracial. So, I've also posted a pix of me with my old buddy Diana (left, above) whom I haven't seen in years. Like a lot of Latina women I've known, Diana dated men of every racial make-up.

The countdown is on! Next week, I'll be moderating the panel "Mixed-Race Relationships" at the Mixed Roots Film and Literary Festival in L.A. If you'd like a copy of the program, hollah at hiphapa@comcast.net

Thank you to everyone who has been so supportive of Hip Hapa Homeez on Facebook. We now have close to 600 members, and we promise to get more active with this group soon!

And, don't forget, we're still offering Hapa*Teez t-shirts to support our Watermelon Sushi film project--which we're auditioning talent for while we're in L.A.

Mad luv to all of you who continue to be cheerleaders for Watermelon Sushi World. I can't thank you enough and I promise to always be...

Your Hip Hapa,

Yayoi